Double Love

Hi gang! Unfortunately, we have to take a break for about six weeks so that Anna can finish her next book. We'll keep you posted and let you know as soon as we have a return date, so thank you for bearing with us. We've released the third episode of our Caitlin bonus series today as an apology.Caitlin is back, and determined to put her frankly half-arsed plan to woo Jed into action. When shy Diana joins the weekend party at Ryan Acres, Caitlin is determined to make the scholarship girl feel as uncomfortable as possible...

Lila's behind bars! And while Steven rides to the rescue to spring her from jail, Lila's supposed best friend and her sanctimonious twin truly do not care that Lila has just been charged with FIRE BOMBING A RESTAURANT. They're more concerned with splitting up her and Steven. Steven is willing to sacrifice his internship to prove Lila's innocence - and he might just have found some crucial evidence that could clear her name. If only he weren't so annoying when he tells her about it... Meanwhile Devon, our least favourite orphan, finally reaches Sweet Valley - and reunites with...

Just when we thought we couldn't hate Devon Whitelaw any more than we already did, he manages to outdo himself in the second half of this terrible book. He's serving as Pete and Linda's go between, but when a casino patron is robbed, Devon starts wondering where Pete gets all his jewels. Is trouble in store for our favourite grifter? Meanwhile Liz is unspeakably awful, Jessica is preposterously angry and as for Lila... well, let's just say we did not expect what happens in the book's final scene. All this and a LOT of people chuckling (seriously, just wait...

We regret to inform you that an alarming amount of this book is devoted to the least sympathetic teenage orphan in literary history, Devon Whitelaw. Having insulted service industry workers and deprived himself of sleep and food for no good reason, Devon hits Vegas where he miraculously finds his black sheep uncle Pete by just...wandering around casinos. Despite being an actual grifter with a touch of OTG, Pete is far too good for Devon and is our favourite character in this book. Meanwhile, back in Sweet Valley, the DA's office continues to be wildly unprofessional, Jessica turns on...

At this stage, we really thought we couldn't be surprised by Sweet Valley's approach to law enforcement and detective work. But then we learned that the only person investigating the crime scene at Fowler Crest, which was almost burned to the ground by an unknown arsonist, is... Steven Wakefield. Yes, who better to figure out how and why a fire started than an 18-year-old intern? And that's just one of the many preposterous things that happen in the latter half of this book! As an increasingly worried Lila starts to wonder if the arsonist is still after her, she...

At last, we're back in Sweet Valley! What with Flair and the Chateau, it feels like we haven't seen the SVH cafeteria in months, but the gang's all here this week, and there's only one topic of conversation: the fire that just destroyed Fowler Crest! Yes, after a sorrowful Lila burns her love letters from Bo while home alone one night, she wakes to find her home in ablaze. She assumes it was an accident - but the DA's office is sure it was arson, and, for some preposterous reason, they enlist none other than Stephen Wakefield to investigate...

It's our last visit to the Chateau d'Amour Inconnu, and we're leaving on a high note, because the second half of the book is full of unhinged drama, including one scene which immediately earns its place in the Sweet Valley gallery of iconic moments. With Jacques nobly sacrificing himself to prove the twins' innocence, will he spend the rest of his days in the dungeon? Will Laurent grow a spine? And will we ever find out the source of the Countess's seemingly limitless power? The answer to all three questions is no! Remember, if you can help...

Release the hounds! The twins have escaped the dungeon, but being the big eejits they are, they can't resist returning to the Chateau for... reasons. Don't expect anything here to make sense, especially the geography of the de Sainte-Maries' kingdom which becomes even more confusing in this book. But there's still a lot to enjoy/mock, including Jessica's surprising bushcraft skills, Laurent having the backbone of a jellyfish (seriously, he might be the biggest sap we've ever encountered in this series and that's saying something) and Jacques's 19th century-style origin story. Remember, if you can help us expand our...

Alas, our hopes for some Frank Cobra level excitement in the second half of this book were not realised, as most of it consists of Jessica being unbearable, Jacques acting like a prize fool, Laurent being a spineless embarrassment and Liz running away crying. Only the constantly shrieking Countess di Rimini and her total disregard for the laws of France bring the drama, and boy does she leave the best until last - yes, it may have been (insanely) spoilered in the book, and yes, we may have to wait until the very end of the book to see...

We're back at the Château, where both twins feel like they've found their happily ever afters with handsome Frenchmen (is Laurent actually French or is he a citizen of the unnamed principality? Unclear). But there's trouble in paradise. Jessica's dreams of being accepted by her royal bosses as the girlfriend of the heir to the Norveaux dukedom are shattered when Jacques spins her a preposterous yarn about ancient feuds, while Liz's initially fairy tale romance with Prince Laurent takes a turn when his parents give him a preposterous ultimatum. This book is full of tedious banter, annoying children a...

As Anna is feeling under the weather this week, unfortunately we don't have a new episode for you. However, here is a taste of the bonus podcast with our second episode of the Caitlin series. We hope you enjoy! If you want to listen to the full series become a member at headstuffpodcasts.com/membership. We're back at Highgate Academy, where Caitlin Ryan continues to be (a) absolutely unhinged and (b) as subtle as a brick. Her scheme to woo rootin' tootin' newcomer Jed hits a snag in the form of "mousy" scholarship girl Diana...

We're coming to the cottage! No, not the fun romantic one, we're talking about Laurent's mysterious maze-adjacent home, where Liz takes refuge after being caught in a storm. This pair of doses met in their dreams (ugh) and now they're staying up all night engaging in witless banter. Is Liz right when she wonders if Laurent is her destiny? He does know the way to woo a Sweet Valley girl (it involves a basket and some fancy cheese). Meanwhile Jessica is starting to feel guilty about burning Todd's letter (if only the royal family didn't have fires blazing at...

We return to the Escher drawing that is the Chateau d'Amour Inconnu, situated on an island that continues to baffle us with its weird geography. Yes, the twins have arrived at their new royal workplace, where their employers are charming but they are expected to sleep in a filthy garret. While Jessica skives off from her duties - looking after children who reinforce our belief that no one involved in the Pascalverse has ever met an actual child – Liz spots a mysterious stranger thrusting his sword outside a cottage (get your minds out of the gutter, people). Has she met...

Bienvenue, listeners! Yes, we're living through the longest, grimmest winter ever, but Jessica and Elizabeth are heading to the south of France again (or as the ghostwriter would have us believe, the first time. René who?) to spend the summer (what summer? Who cares!) as au pairs. To our great delight, Todd basically tells Liz he can't trust her and sets her free for the summer. You'd think she'd be delighted given her previous antics but she spends the entire journey to the Chateau d'Amour Inconnu crying and sulking. Unlike Jessica, who strikes up an instant rapport wi...

Having been fired from her internship at the world's least professional fashion magazine thanks to Leona's lies, Liz feels utterly defeated. But when Jessica suggests a little light burgling, she starts to wonder if she can expose the scheming editor. But she - and indeed we - underestimated Leona's sheer unhingedness! Meanwhile Jessica faces career disappointment and discovers that literally everyone involved with Mode Publications is deeply unprofessional and inappropriate, and Todd finds himself at rock bottom. Things really go off the rails in spectacular fashion in the second half of this book and we absolutely loved it - d...

We're back in the Flair offices, and the hinges are totally coming off now. Liz puts her supposedly brilliant revenge scheme into action, with some frankly unnecessary help from Maria and Enid whose own internships have clearly fallen by the wayside. But will Leona foil her plans? Meanwhile Jessica's career seems to be taking off - but she's stuck with odious Quentin instead of less obviously odious but still criminal Cameron, who has vanished from the Mode mail room. But who is that mysterious tuxedo-clad figure who the twins keep spotting at ritzy locales? Plus Todd discovers living alone...

Sorry gang, we have no new episode today, but we'll be back next week to talk about the Flair office and what appears to be Liz's Working Girl storyline. Join us then for part one of Fashion Victim! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever looked at an Ancient Roman themed fashion shoot and thought "what this really needs is some random cats wandering around with no expert supervision?" Have you ever bunked off work and left a teenage intern - with whom you inexplicably discuss your personal life - to do your job? Well, you'd be right at home in the Flair offices! Yes, the world's most chaotic and unprofessional magazine reaches new heights of lunacy this week, as Jessica seizes her chance to steal Simone's crown, Quentin's crew manage to create a rain machine in about five minutes, and Le...

We don't have a new episode for you today, but we thought you might like to hear Gwyneth's amazing email in full to tide you over until next week. Also, don't forget to vote for Anna's book Our Song in the Irish Book Awards! Cast your vote here: ⁠https://www.irishbookawards.ie/vote/⁠ This show is part of the HeadStuff Podcast Network. For more, go to ⁠HeadStuffPodcasts.com⁠, where you can also become a member of HeadStuff+ and get exclusive access to bonus material and lots more. Learn more about your a...

We're back in the wildly unprofessional offices of Flair, where Liz's dream job is turning into a nightmare. She's still reeling after catching Todd and Simone in a passionate embrace and now her mentor Leona seems to be crushing her dreams. Though as soon becomes clear, Leona's editorial instincts are questionable at best. Meanwhile Jessica attempts to juggle romances with two adult men who should be in jail, and Todd finds himself being pressurised to join a techno conga line at a hot LA club. We're really in the nineties now!  Vote for Anna's book Our Song in...